Droll Pranks for Rich Boys

The wealthy young gentleman's guide to horseplay

Slightly raise the nets on another fellow’s tennis courts. The poor fellow’s next tennis performance will be a comedy of unforced errors!

Dull the blade of another fellow’s letter opener. You will delight as the defeated fellow cries himself to sleep on top of a pile of unopened letters!

Alter another fellow’s portrait so that his hand is not in his jacket, but in the waistband of his pants like a common pervert.

Train another fellow’s dressage horse to do the Lambada. His fellow equestrians will ostracize him when they see his horse’s dirty dancing!

Replace a lock of hair from another fellow’s beloved with hairs from a donkey’s rump. You will delight as the poor fellow lovingly strokes the coarse, foul-smelling hairs across his rosy cheeks.

Replace another fellow’s anti-aging cream with accelerated-aging ointment. The poor fellow’s face will sag like the skin on an old tomato!

Run another fellow’s Flemish tapestries through a washing machine.

Droll Pranks for Rich Boys: the Wealthy Young Gentleman’s Guide to Horseplay [TumblrBookSearch]

Title:

"Droll Pranks for Rich Boys: the Wealthy Young Gentleman’s Guide to Horseplay"

Synopsis:

An expertly curated collection of pranks for the refined prankster — specifically intended for privileged, effete young rich boys. The style of the book would be a marriage of old etiquette texts, such as George Washington’s “Rules of Civility & Decent Behavior in Company and Conversation,” and classic humor books, such as “Deep Thoughts” by Jack Handey. In addition to a list of 101 Droll Pranks (several examples of which are listed below), the book could be expanded with additional content, such as New Yorker-style black and white illustrations, a Droll Prankster’s Code of Conduct, and sheet music and lyrics to the Droll Prankster’s Anthem.

Sample Posts:

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Spread grease on another fellow’s outdoor chess board. He will watch in horror as his human chess pieces slip and slide across the board!

Sew a pocket on the front of another fellow’s favorite shirt. The poor fellow will look like he’s wearing a common workman’s blouse!

Plant a venus flytrap in another fellow’s ladybug garden.

Put single-ply toilet tissue in another fellow’s lavatory. On his next visit to the loo, the poor buffoon will be in for a rough surprise!

Replace another fellow’s guard dogs with gentle Swiss hug-hounds. The poor fellow’s intruders will be greeted with exuberant puppy kisses!

Add extra sand to another fellow’s hourglass. You will triumph as the poor fool sits in his study, whiling away the hours.