Droll Pranks for Rich Boys

The wealthy young gentleman's guide to horseplay

Run another fellow’s Flemish tapestries through a washing machine.

Droll Pranks for Rich Boys: the Wealthy Young Gentleman’s Guide to Horseplay [TumblrBookSearch]

Title:

"Droll Pranks for Rich Boys: the Wealthy Young Gentleman’s Guide to Horseplay"

Synopsis:

An expertly curated collection of pranks for the refined prankster — specifically intended for privileged, effete young rich boys. The style of the book would be a marriage of old etiquette texts, such as George Washington’s “Rules of Civility & Decent Behavior in Company and Conversation,” and classic humor books, such as “Deep Thoughts” by Jack Handey. In addition to a list of 101 Droll Pranks (several examples of which are listed below), the book could be expanded with additional content, such as New Yorker-style black and white illustrations, a Droll Prankster’s Code of Conduct, and sheet music and lyrics to the Droll Prankster’s Anthem.

Sample Posts:

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Spread grease on another fellow’s outdoor chess board. He will watch in horror as his human chess pieces slip and slide across the board!

Sew a pocket on the front of another fellow’s favorite shirt. The poor fellow will look like he’s wearing a common workman’s blouse!

Plant a venus flytrap in another fellow’s ladybug garden.

Put single-ply toilet tissue in another fellow’s lavatory. On his next visit to the loo, the poor buffoon will be in for a rough surprise!

Replace another fellow’s guard dogs with gentle Swiss hug-hounds. The poor fellow’s intruders will be greeted with exuberant puppy kisses!

Add extra sand to another fellow’s hourglass. You will triumph as the poor fool sits in his study, whiling away the hours.

Steal another fellow’s pool jewelry. At his next pool party, the poor fellow’s guests will sneer at his naked ankles and unadorned wrists.

Put bedsheets with a slightly lower thread count on another fellow’s bed. You will delight in the addled fellow’s fitful slumbers.

Add gutters and walls to another fellow’s ‘infinity pool.’ His guests will feel no sense of awe as they splash around his sad, finite pool.

Give another fellow a bottle of 1959 Chateau Lafite Rothschild and a faulty decanter. You will delight as the poor dupe suffocates his wine.

Heed the call of nature in another fellow’s vineyard. Next year, his pinot will taste like pee, no?

Hide small weights in another fellow’s ballet slippers. At his next recital, the lumbering clod will be mocked for his oafish pointe work.

Cut a hole in another fellow’s butterfly net. You will delight in his exasperation as he blunders through the garden, whiffing at monarchs.